Dealing with the takers who struggle to give back


Here’s a discussion point I’d like to put out there. Have you noticed a particular type of personality, that no matter what you do, always seem incapable or unwilling to give back as much as you give them?

I know we call people greedy, self-absorbed but that feels very surface level for me. I always like to go much deeper and try to understand what is making them tick. Laziness is more likely to be someone struggling with motivation because they feel depressed. Greed is because of fear of not having enough, so they need to take whatever they can before it runs out.

So these are mental well-being issues, right? I have come to a fork in the road where I need to identify this behaviour more quickly because these individuals seem to have an insatiable appetite to take and my ability to invite them to dare to give back because they will never lose has not worked.

Some of the behaviours I notice with these people include:

  • Not very attentive and struggle to stay focused
  • Highly emotional and are quick to judge
  • They make excuses and blame everyone around them
  • They make lots of promises and struggle to follow through most of the time
  • They apologise and feel guilty but keep repeating the cycle.

And what about the popular belief that you should give without expectations? In an abundant world, if you are finding yourself giving without receiving, then you are creating too many agreements with takers who are self-deceived into scarcity and disconnected from their purpose to also give. By expecting takers to be willing and able to give can be healthy, rather than giving them a licence to simply keep taking without the balance of giving.

My question is, what has been your experience and have you found a way to help people stuck in this attitude and behaviour pattern?

Related Posts