How passion can trump logic

Logic is a passion of mine. I always strive to be logical. However, I am learning to separate being wrong from my self worth. Easier said than done, but infinitely more rewarding done than said.  It has been a hard and costly road because I associated acceptance and approval from being right. I have also witnessed relationships get destroyed because of this infatuation with being right and anxious at the idea of ever being wrong. It punishes the person in that state of mind and the receiver. Everyone loses.

Being right rather than wrong only gets you so far. I have noticed two extremes when this is the driver. On the passive side is where we procrastinate, become too fearful of consequences if we make a mistake. Some call this being too perfectionistic. The aggressive side is when we see people being wrong as being stupid, reckless and the abuse towards them is motivated by a misguided sense of protection.

The fear of being wrong can end up being much worse than simply being wrong.

When you cut and run from people because you don’t want to tell them they are stupid for being wrong and hurt their feelings, you have already committed the worse act that would hurt their feelings. You have abandoned them out of the fear they will abandon you. A client recently shook his head in disbelief that he was doing this and not realising it.

If you raise your voice and become condescending because you are panicking at someone holding onto the wrong point of view, you are already being wrong yourself. You are telling them that they do not deserve respect or compassion for being wrong. You are telling them that if they are wrong, they are being dangerous, reckless and causing serious consequences.

How often do you think this attitude is warranted? In a life and death situation, yell all you want to help jolt people into awareness to save lives. However, the brain associates this outcome starting from a difference of an opinion. The problem is, we associate being wrong with leading to life threatening consequences. The reality 99% of the time is that being wrong is simply an opportunity to learn and grow on the path to realising our goals.

What if passion to have a go and act on what you believe makes being right or wrong less important?

I recall a dear mentor being emphatic about this point when I was 19 and it stuck with me. He said if you just make a decision, right or wrong, that decision gives you movement, perspective and an opportunity to learn, change direction and grow. No action however gives you nothing.

I have come to learn that this advice is very relevant for those paralysed by the fear of making mistakes and failing. However, we know the balance is important. You won’t be getting those people running out of their cave with this advice because it sounds reckless. What if you you used your logic to prepare the best you can within a reasonable timeframe and then jumped into thoughtful action knowing that life is a series of trial and error experiences anyway?

No success has recalled being blessed with choosing a path that was paved with right decisions. Instead, they recall all the mistakes and how those moments gave the an opportunity to learn, change their views and move beyond the obstacles.

Passion turns on the abundance because when people are passionate, they create cooperation, synergy and enthusiasm from others. They move with momentum into places that reveal opportunities on an ongoing basis.

Have you been frustrated by fearing being wrong or by someone who always make out that their way is the only safe, responsible and wise way? Do you have situations where passion and experience helped you learn and succeed, and that no amount of analysis would have prepared you for the journey to realising a goal?

George Helou is the founder of EP7 – Empowered for Purpose in 7 Steps. Life Coach, Work Culture Consultant, Author and Motivational Speaker, George has 15 years personal development experience and is based in his Life Coach Perth Office in Subiaco. 08 9380 8350.

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